February 28, 2002
The Lord’s prayer

The mental wounds are deeply cut into a wrist that cannot battle to save its life. Be it oh Lord, the test of all tests… but Lord does it have to be my death? Am I the fierce lion with a silent roar? Do I walk with no weapons purely out of choice? Tell me oh Lord, why hath the blood of my corporate brother lain wasted on my grave? I am in question as to whom I am to be—to become so many faces… I have fallen to my knees unable to cry, for the soldier inside is meant to die. Be it oh Lord, the test of all tests… before I close my final breath, answer to each of them only one wish… don’t sever he who sacrificed, for I am he who has become nothing more than silent.

**note—while you page through these 1021 thoughts…I invite you to keep in mind—this book isn’t to serve as an autobiography. The emotions you feel are very real, and have the power to invite anger, depression, and protectiveness, as well as a need to help the author. That’s not the purpose of this book. I’ve dedicated my honest approach to writing to help you—to put forth the effort of giving you a place where reality’s bite can be eased. Although the events of these 1021 thoughts are very true—my only request is, tell your heart, “I don’t know the author.” The pain for me is too deep, your reaction, be it silent, be it vocal, or held in the highest warmth available to any man or woman, is but an open wound… it brings great injury to me, having to live through it again, and again. Learn from my path, take from my path, build new foundations to a of place higher levels of creative flow… my only wish is to keep your focus on the future, and not imprisoned within the tangled webs once lived. These thoughts now serve as a reason for you to share positive outcomes from pitfalls and failures that once consumed your dreams come true.