Welcome to You Already Know, the podcast with jokes about news you already know. My name is James Creviston and I am a comedian in Los Angeles. Here are this weeks news jokes.

A New Jersey high school teacher who called a student a "loser" in a Facebook post has had her teaching license suspended for two years. She is the loser of her job.

Researchers say complaints and "humble-brags" about being too busy or overworked have replaced stories about vacations and skipping out of work for a round of golf or a ballgame as ways of signaling social status. I wanted to give you a punch line for this story but I couldn’t get away from work.

Researchers at George Mason University have created a synthetic version of an antimicrobial compound using a substance in Komodo dragon blood. It’s also the same thing that is inside Purell.

Scientists have created a device that can pull drinking water from the air using only the power of sunlight. God has created something similar, it’s called a cloud.

A recents study has found that clean eating is a “ticking timebomb” that could leave young people with weak bones. The study also went on to say that the McRib is back.


These are the jokes for April 18, 2017. I’m James Creviston and this is You Already Know.